Salted Fish Chapter 63

 Chapter 63

A Settled Heart

Xiao Shan didn't look at Xie Zhui's expression. After hearing his reflection, Xiao Shan said directly, "The environment you were in before was relatively simple; as long as you were strong enough, that was all that mattered. But this is the capital, the place with the highest concentration of nobility. The messy affairs here are not only numerous but also bizarre. Things like favoring concubines over wives or swapping marriages—if you hear enough of them, you could write a sensational story."

"But fortunately, in our prince's residence, it's just you and me. When the child is born, it will be the three of us. With no one else interfering in our lives, we don't have to worry about such things."

Xie Zhui's anxious heart was instantly soothed by these words. However, moments later, that unruly heart began to beat rapidly.

Xiao Shan's words implied that in the future, it would only be the two of them by his side, with no one else. Even if they had children, they would be theirs, and there would be no others involved.

Xie Zhui heard similar words from Xiao Shan before, and Xiao Shan always acted accordingly. However, hearing it now felt entirely different from hearing it in the past.

In the past, Xie Zhui couldn't help but mentally respond with, "Really?" Even if he took Xiao Shan's words seriously, there would always be a sliver of doubt and mistrust in his heart, wondering if these promises had an expiration date.

But now, he didn't want to ask, nor did he want to know if these words had a time limit.

He didn't even want Xiao Shan to think about the fact that, as a prince, he could have secondary consorts or secondary husbands. Nor did he want him to know that in other households, when the main wife or consort was pregnant, they would sleep in separate beds.

Xie Zhui now felt that it was perfect for Xiao Shan to have eyes and heart only for him. Therefore, he didn't need to ask too many questions, which might remind Xiao Shan of things he should be mindful of. Since Xiao Shan hadn't thought in that direction, there was no need for Xie Zhui to bring it up and make himself unhappy.

So, Xie Zhui averted his eyes and said softly, "Yes, this way, we don't have to think too much or worry too much."

Xie Zhui realized that he had changed.

In the past, before he went to the battlefield and was still a simple ger from the Xie family, he would occasionally think about what kind of life he would have after getting married. Back then, he only imagined living a life of mutual respect and harmony with his future husband.

He knew that his appearance and temperament were not particularly likable, and he never thought of clinging to anyone. So, after getting married, he wouldn't care how many concubines or attendants his future husband had, nor would he pay them any mind.

However, these people couldn't offend him either; they would just live their lives peacefully alongside each other.

In fact, many families would teach their daughters or gers to capture the heart of their future husband. But Xie Zhui had been taught from a young age to guard his own heart. After getting married, being devoted to one person and putting him first in everything was simply impossible.

Later, Xie Zhui went to the battlefield, where swords and arrows had no eyes. He didn't know when he might die on the battlefield. The path that gers were supposed to take was completely abandoned by him, and his daily thoughts were focused on how to survive.

During those anxious, sleepless nights, he had also thought about what life would be like if his identity were revealed. He imagined spending his days in solitude, accompanied only by the light of a lamp and the teachings of Buddha.

But fate intertwined his life with Xiao Shan's.

This man was completely different from any other he had met. Xiao Shan lived authentically, freely, and with an extraordinary flamboyance. While others saw Xiao Shan as uneducated and lacking in refinement, to Xie Zhui, his personality was genuine and captivating.

In just a few short months, Xie Zhui's heart, which he had never intended to move, was stirred.

Bit by bit, Xiao Shan eroded his heart and soul, making him unlike his former self—stubborn to a frightening degree.

At the Rining Hunting Grounds, when Xiao Shan was injured and his life hung in the balance, Xie Zhui nearly went mad upon witnessing the scene. At that moment, he even wanted to kill everyone present. During the days when Xiao Shan was unconscious, he was filled with extreme fear and panic.

He was terrified that he might never see Xiao Shan again.

He feared that Xiao Shan would go to a place where he could never find him, just like in his nightmares.

He had seen the most wonderful person in the world, and the thought of losing him overnight was a pain he couldn't even bear to imagine.

Fortunately, Xiao Shan pulled through. Fortunately, they still had a long, long time to be together.

Of course, as time went on, there would be more uncertainties. Xiao Shan was a prince, and he could choose from the most beautiful and charming women or the most refined and handsome gers in the world.

Xie Zhui knew that he didn't have the advantage in this regard, but he also knew that Xiao Shan never had eyes for anyone else.

So, he wouldn't push Xiao Shan towards others; he wasn't foolish.

And in places where Xie Zhui couldn't see, a fleeting smile would appear on Xiao Shan's lips. He understood Xie Zhui's thoughts clearly. But he was different from other men.

There were many temptations around him, but from the beginning, he excluded them all.

To this day, his eyes only held Xie Zhui.

Some things didn't need to be said repeatedly; actions spoke louder than words and could soothe the heart more effectively.

What Xie Zhui wanted was something he could easily give—a heart. If Xie Zhui wanted it, he would give it.

They didn't continue the conversation on this topic, silently reaching a mutual understanding.

***

In the following days, Consort Xian remained confined, and Xiao Xian still couldn't see her.

Xiao Jin was constantly busy, with too many matters to investigate.

When the first light snow of the year fell in the capital, Xiao Jin's first child reached her full month.

On that day, the Emperor and Empress sent gifts, and several princes, except for the too-young Xiao Xian, also sent many items.

Xiao Shan's gift was the most interesting. Besides valuable items, he included a rattle drum that made a bouncing sound when shaken. To be honest, it looked like something sold by a street vendor and wasn't worth much, but it was amusing and could entertain a child.

Xiao Jin shook the rattle drum back and forth a couple of times and laughed, "Third Brother, you are thoughtful."

Liu Jingyi was coaxing the baby, who just woke up hungry and had just finished eating but hadn't closed her eyes yet. Liu Jingyi's complexion didn't look good; she was feeling down because the Empress openly protected Lady Xu, which had left her in a gloomy mood recently.

Upon hearing Xiao Jin's words, she lowered her eyes to look at the child in her arms and said, "Yes, very thoughtful."

Xiao Jin put away the rattle drum and then looked at the little girl who was about to fall asleep. He said, "Let's call this little girl 'Little Snowball*' as her nickname. The 'Xue' character matches today's snowy scene. I hope she grows up chubby, strong, and healthy. As for her formal name, we'll let Father Emperor and Mother Empress decide. I hope she can be blessed by them and grow up happy and healthy."

*Xiao Xuedun

Liu Jingyi softly murmured "Little Snowball" a couple of times, then suddenly smiled.

She looked up at Xiao Jin and said, "This name doesn't seem like your usual style, Crown Prince."

Xiao Jin smiled slightly. "I learned it from Third Brother. He has a broad mind and names things as he pleases. I want to learn from him."

Liu Jingyi remained silent.

Xiao Jin looked at Little Snowball, who closed her eyes again, feeling a complex mix of emotions. This was his first child, a child he had long awaited.

He felt a deep compassion for this child, for her experiences, and for her frail body.

Though the nickname seemed casual, he heard common folk say that simple names were easier to raise*.

*is a traditional belief that giving a child a humble or simple name can bring good fortune and make it easier for the child to grow up healthy and strong.

Naturally, he couldn't give the little girl a nickname like some flower or plants, so "Little Snowball" was just right.

Watching Liu Jingyi carefully place the child into the bed, Xiao Jin suddenly asked, "What does it feel like to be a mother?"

Liu Jingyi's heart skipped a beat. She looked at Xiao Jin and saw that his gaze was fixed on the child.

She took a deep breath and said, "I don't know what it feels like for other mothers, but I only know that I want to give everything in this world to this child. If she falls ill, I will feel heartbroken. I would rather be sick myself than see her suffer."

Hearing this, Xiao Jin's eyes suddenly focused and then unfocused. He said, "Is that so? So, mothers in this world do everything for their children?"

So, there were all kinds of struggles for power and status.

Liu Jingyi said, "I've heard a saying, 'A mother becomes strong for her child.' This is the biggest realization I've had since giving birth. I used to cry over everything, and the Crown Prince reminded me many times, but I would still forget when things happened. Now, I can calmly think through matters, which is a blessing. In my opinion, as long as a mother hasn't done anything heinous, it's normal for her to be a bit partial to her own child." The implication was that while a mother may favor her child, she wouldn't do anything extreme.

Xiao Jin didn't speak. He looked deeply at the sleeping child under the blanket, his eyes filled with complex emotions that were hard to decipher.

Liu Jingyi glanced at him and softly added, "I am just a woman with limited knowledge, and my thoughts may not be entirely correct. In my heart, a child needs both a mother and a father."

Xiao Jin responded absentmindedly, "Mm," then stood up and said, "The child is asleep. I have matters to attend to. You should rest well."

Liu Jingyi wanted to get up to see him off, but Xiao Jin didn't let her.

After Xiao Jin left, Liu Jingyi's expression changed.

She glanced at the rattle drum that Xiao Shan had sent, her expression becoming more subdued. She called to the palace attendant beside her, "Keep the items sent by the Prince Li separately. The Crown Prince values Prince Li, so take good care of the things he sent, even if they are just toys."

The palace attendant responded and left. When Liu Jingyi was alone in the room, she looked at the child on the bed, who knew nothing of the world, her eyes filled with complex emotions. She stroked the child's cheek, closed her eyes, and whispered in a barely audible voice, "I will protect you."

Liu Jingyi knew her strengths and weaknesses. Giving birth to this child had taken a toll on her body.

But she thought she needed to adjust her emotions and then give birth to a legitimate son for the Crown Prince.

Having a legitimate son would be her foundation in the Eastern Palace and, in the future, her standing in the imperial harem.

So, she needed to recover her health as soon as possible and then make further plans.

As for Lady Xu, since the Empress was protecting her, Liu Jingyi would just wait and see.

***

The matter of the Crown Prince being attacked at the hunting grounds was handed over to Zong Qing, the Deputy Minister of the Court of Judicial Review, by the Emperor to investigate.

Xiao Shan recognized him as an acquaintance.

Thinking of Zong Qing's straightforwardness, Xiao Shan felt that the Emperor's choice was quite good. Although Zong Qing took more time to investigate cases, he was thorough and meticulous, so this case would likely be resolved clearly under his scrutiny.

Just as Xiao Shan felt he could enjoy a couple of quiet days, trouble arose in the palace.

Consort Lan's chief maid, Cui Shu, sent a message to Xiao Shan, saying that the Empress suddenly summoned Consort Lan and severely reprimanded her. When Consort Lan left the Empress' palace, she was almost in tears, while the Empress also called for an imperial physician, reportedly looking pale and suffering from a heart condition.

When the Empress scolded Consort Lan, she had all the palace attendants leave, so no one knew what happened. From the faint sounds coming from the hall, it seemed the Empress was very angry, calling Consort Lan an ingrate.

This was unprecedented in the years the two sisters had been in the palace. No matter what trouble Consort Lan caused in the past, the Empress would always support her. This time was different, and Cui Shu was alarmed by what she saw.

Consort Lan returned to her palace and only cried, saying nothing. Cui Shu didn't know what to do, so she sent someone to inform Xiao Shan.

Xiao Shan remained silent for a moment after hearing this and then said, "I will visit the palace to see Mother Consort later. You may go back now."

After the people from Consort Lan's palace left, Xie Zhui stepped forward and whispered, "Could it be that there are too many loose tongues in Mother Consort's palace, and someone overheard her thoughts?"

Consort Lan's temperament hadn't changed over the years. Whatever she did to make the Empress this angry must not be a trivial matter. Xie Zhui's first thought was that Consort Lan's suspicion that the Empress pushed Xiao Shan was discovered by the Empress.

Otherwise, things wouldn't have escalated to this extent.

If Consort Lan and the Empress had a falling out, what about Xiao Shan and Xiao Jin? Would their relationship be affected?

Thinking about this made Xie Zhui's stomach ache.

Xiao Shan sighed deeply after hearing this and said, "Yes, you thought of it too."

Years later, when Xie Zhui recalled Xiao Shan's deep sigh, he still felt an indescribable emotion in his heart.

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